April Fools and Simon Says
by FireboltMirror
Summary: Renesmee Cullen is now 25 human years and lives with Jacob in La Push. But one night the unexpected happens; Renesmee's pregnant. Renesmee's and Jacob's pov.
1. Preface

PREFACE

"Happy birthday," he said and kissed me. We had just gotten home from my 24th-birthday party.

The wolf pack had given me a guitar, just as I wished for. But right now, I didn't think about my gifts.

I was present.

Our lips never left each other. He held me tighter. It didn't hurt.

We had never done this before, but we'd been quite close a few times. Lately, he'd been begging me almost every night.

But I had refused.

Of course I wanted to, too. But I didn't want to rush things. Plus my Dad was Edward Cullen...

He'd waited long enough. 24 years for me to budge. The 41 years of his life.

We stumbled around our house. I could feel his heavy breathing against my body.

He grabbed my shirt and pulled it over my head.

I did not refuse.

And neither did he.


	2. 1 Dinner

I stared at myself in the mirror. No way! I only wore underwear, I had just woken up. Jake was out with the pack. I turned to look at my profile.

It is hard, trying to deny the impossible truth. One month had gone. I had never been late before. Never! Not a single day.

One month.

My eyes scanned my body. Evidently, my face was green. At least it felt green. I dashed into the bathroom.

Oh, no! Throwing up was not a good sign. I went into the kitchen and filled a glass of water. As I drank it, I realized I had to see Carlisle. Tomorrow. Maybe...

I kept on thinking like that the whole day. Jacob came home about 3 pm. He reminded me of the fact that Sam, Emily, and their two sons Adam and Leonard, was going to have dinner with us. Luckily, I hadn't forgotten.

I'd taken a shower just before he got home, and I was beginning to cook. I was a very good chef, I had to admit. Tonight I was making pork chop with an apple sauce and potatoes.

The Uleys came over at seven. Dinner was just ready, and I asked Jacob to lay the table.

"Smells great." he said as he entered the kitchen.

"Thank you," I said and looked down in the floor, a little embarrassed. Emotions had attacked me all day, and I figured it must be the...thing.

"Hey, is there something wrong?" Jake said, taking my face in his hands.

_Everything's wrong!_ I almost thought.

"No." He looked right into my eyes, doubting.

"You sure about that? Nothing wrong at all?"

"Yes and no," I answered both of his questions. He kissed my forehead and put his arm around my waist. He held me close to him as he led me to the living room.

"Dinner's ready," I said to our guests. Emily was the one to react first.

"Do you have any special seatings in mind?" she asked politely.

"No, we're not that formal," I answered her. Jake was talking to Sam, I didn't bother to listen.

"Then I'll sit next to you, I think."

"Sure," I said and smiled. _Thank you, Emily!_ Jake sat down at my other side. He took my hand instead. I held it tight; I needed him close to me.

Leo was the youngest of the two boys, he'd recently turned thirteen. He didn't say that much, filled with hormones, obviously. He sat down across from Emily. Next to hem was Adam.

Adam was fifteen, almost sixteen. He hadn't got the "fever" yet, though it was just a matter of time. So far he was acting very nice to everybody.

Sam sat next to Adam, opposite Jacob.

"Enjoy!" I said when everyone was seated.

The food was appreciated, nothing was left over. We had a really good time, almost crying with laughter sometimes. Everyone but Leo. After about an hour he asked Emily if he could go home.

"Leo..." Emily said. He sighed and looked out the window.

"It's okay," I whispered to Emily. She sighed, too.

"Fine."

"Keys?"

"Under the flowers—"

"As usual..." He left with heavy steps, and his head was hanging down like a dead flower.

"Please excuse him. He just broke up with his girlfriend," Sam said.

"Oh, of course," I said. The conversations moved on. Emily and I talked about a movie we had seen last week. It was a comedy, and it was really funny. We still laughed at some parts.

I really enjoyed myself as the hours passed by. I ended up in Jacob's arms, cuddling a little.

But suddenly, totally out of the blue, the nice atmosphere was destroyed by a question from Sam.

"So, have you guys thought about marriage and children yet?"

Awkward silence. Luckily I already held Jacob's hand. _Please, Jake, say something!_

"No, we haven't talked about that yet..." I let go of his hand.

_Fuck!_ I did not like swearing at all, but it felt like I didn't have a choice.

Jake put his arm around me, so that his hand was placed at the middle of my stomach.

Adam started talking about his school-project instead. My eyes were probably screaming _Thank you, Adam!_

Then, with the perfect timing, the incomprehensible happened. The thing turned! With Jake's hand on it!

Jacob had just begun to relax, when he froze. I couldn't even feel him breathing.

_FUCK!_ This wasn't happening!

"Renesmee," he breathed into my ear. I swallowed. "What. Was. That?" I didn't know what to say. I didn't even notice that everything was quiet. I ran outside.

"Nessie!" Jake shouted and ran after me.

"I don't know..." I murmured to myself.

"What was that?" he repeated. "Is it what I think it is?"

I sat down by my favorite tree. But Jacob wouldn't let me. He dragged me up to my feet again. It was like I was somewhere else. Jacob was standing in front of me, talking to me. I even think he was shaking me.

I didn't react. His voice was far away, and so were my thoughts. I had to see Carlisle. Now.

I came back to reality.

"...made a test? Are you sure? How long...?

"Shh!" He looked at me. "One question at a time," I ordered. He swallowed and scrubbed his face with his hands.

"Renesmee, are you pregnant?" he said between his hands.

"I don't know." Almost true...

"So you haven't made a test?"

"No." True.

He nodded once. "Do you want to?"

"What? Make a test?"

He nodded again. I shook my head.

"Okay," he said. I thought the interrogation was over, but apparently, it wasn't. "For how long have you known?"

"I said I didn't know—"

"How long, Nessie?" He glared at me.

"I've been late for one month," I almost said.

He heard me. "Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, pleading now.

"I don't know..." He made me feel embarrassed. I guess it was fair enough.

"You don't know..." he chuckled surly.

"No," I murmured. "I love you." He turned to look around at the house, and I took my chance.

I ran. Away from Jacob, away from the house, away from our guests. Away from the questions.

"Renesmee!" I heard him call after me. I was afraid he'd follow, but I did not turn around.

Since I didn't know where Dad was, I had to keep my thoughts away from him. _Carlisle, Carlisle, Carlisle..._

When I got to the big house, I took a quick look in the window. My cheeks was striped with tears.

I opened the front door. "Carlisle?" I called quietly. Rosalie came down the stairs.

"He and Esme is out, hunting. Is there something wrong?" I ignored her question.

"When will he be back?" I didn't care about Esme right now.

"Tomorrow, I think."

"Thank you, Rose," I said and turned.

"No problem..."

I decided to text Jacob. I knew it was cowardly done, but I couldn't talk to him yet.

**I'm sorry. Sleeping at Mom and Dad's tonight. Please forgive me.**

After a half minute, I got reply.

**I love you. You're forgiven. I understand.**

I replied a short message, too.

**I love you too. Thank you.**


	3. 2 Story

I ran through the forest. _Dad, leave. Dad, leave. Dad, leave!_ I slowed down a little when I saw the house, or should I say cottage? _Leave, leave, leave. And don't ask._

He went outside, looked at me for a brief moment, and ran away, towards the big house. _Blue, blue, blue, blue._

I opened the front door. _My room, room, room, room, room._ Mom came after me. I lay down in my bed, and she lay at my side.

Silence. She new just how to make me feel better.

"Shh, it's okay. Everything is okay." The tears gushed down my face.

"Can you tell me something?"

"What? Do you have anything in mind?"

"No, nothing in particular."

"Okay. There's actually something I would like you to know."

I waited for her to continue.

"You know I haven't lived here in Forks like this all the time," she started.

I thought about my very first memory, Mom as human.

"I lived in Phoenix at first, with Renée and Phil. But when I was seventeen I moved here, to live with Charlie.

"First day at school was horrible. I met this weird, but beautiful guy. We were lab partners in Biology, but the following week or so, he was gone."

"Dad, right?"

"Yup. Anyway, my friends and me went on a trip to La Push First Beach. That's when I met Jacob for the first time. He told me some quileute legends. Soon after that, I understood what Edward and his siblings were."

"Vampires?"

"Yes. Then it all began."

"What?"

"I'm about to tell you. Be patient."

"Yeah, whatever."

"Anyway, Edward and I fell in love—"

"Aw…"

"Stop interrupting me!"

I chuckled. "'Kay."

"I had this dream, to become like him. But he didn't want that to happen. So they left Forks."

I knew this; that Dad had left.

"I was depressed for months. But then I met Jacob again. We hung out almost every day. Until the fever set in.

He told me to remember what he'd said at the beach, when we'd first met. After a while I realized what he was, a werewolf.

"We became friends again, but not entirely like before. He wasn't the same."

"Get to the point…"

"Sorry. Got caught up by the moment…"

"'S okay."

"Right. Anyway, I jumped off a cliff—"

"You did what?"

"I went cliff diving. No big deal."

"Yeah, right…"

"No. But Alice thought I was dead, and Rose told Edward. So he went to the Volturi—" I winced at my memories of the black robes. "—But I'm not going to give you nightmares by telling you that story.

"Anyhow, they got back to Forks. But Jake and I were better friends than what Edward approved. Plus, Jake's feelings for me were of a different kind than mine were for him.

"By now Edward had promised to change me. He would do it himself on one condition. I would have to marry him."

"And you did," I commented.

"Not exactly. Later. Just let me talk."

"You don't really like it when I interrupt, do you?"

"Not at all."

I smiled.

"When Jake found out about our marriage he was mad and disappointed. So he left. He left La Push. We didn't know where he was, not even Sam knew.

"But we didn't let that stop out plans. The wedding was beautiful, you should have been there."

"Do you have any pictures?"

"Sure, I'll show you sometime."

She didn't say anything for a while.

"That's it? End of story?"

"Oh, right. Forgot. Sorry.

"At the party, we got visit from a very close friend."

"Jacob!"

"Yes. You have no idea how glad I was."

"I can imagine."

She sighed.

"Where was your honeymoon?" I could ask that, right?

"You will find out eventually," she said, smug.

"Hey! That's not fair!"

"Actually, it is. I didn't know until we were there."

"Haha, okay." I chuckled. But then I remembered why I was here, and started to cry again.

"My little baby," Mom whispered and took me in her arms.

I cried myself to sleep that night.


	4. 3 Revelations

3.  
REVELATIONS

Suddenly the sun peeked through my window.  
"Is Dad here?" I asked.  
"Yes. I can ask him to leave if you want?"  
"No, that's fine." I got up and looked at myself in the mirror. A big mistake. I knew I was beautiful, but right now I couldn't think of anything else than my tomato-red cheeks and my hair that looked like a haystack. I groaned.  
I picked up my comb and a hair ribbon. In five seconds I was beautiful again.  
"Will you tell me what's wrong?"  
"Tonight," I said without thinking.  
"Promise?"_  
No?_ I sighed. "Mm…"  
She gave me the "yes-or-no?" eye.  
I sighed once more. "Yes! Okay. Promise." I realized I had lifted my hands in a gesture that reminded of what you'd do if a police caught you, stealing something or driving too fast.  
"Thank you."

I thought about what Mom had told me that night. About her life. Of course I knew Jacob and Mom had been in love, but I didn't know how complicated things had been. Though she did stop at her and Dad's wedding. Maybe just because she knew I was tired, but I thought there must have been another reason. Something she didn't want me to know. Something about me…

I still wanted to talk with Carlisle, so I thought _Carlisle, Carlisle, Carlisle_ during the whole breakfast.  
I didn't hear a word from the living room. Mom must have been "telling" Dad about the night. Great.  
I got up to the big house as soon as I could, and knocked on Carlisle's door.  
"Come on in, Renesmee." I opened the door.  
"What can I do for you today?" he asked.  
"A lot…" I murmured. He looked questioning at me.  
"First of all, I have to ask you not to think about the following conversation."  
"I understand." He smiled shyly. _Thank you, Carlisle, Carlisle, Carlisle…_  
"Do you have any post-its?"  
"Sure," he said and opened a drawer in his desk.  
"Thank you," I said as he handed me the post-its and a pen. I began writing, holding my hand up as a wall.  
"And this secret is safe with you?"  
"Of course!"  
I showed him the post-it.

_**I'm late**_

He took a deep breath and grabbed the pen and the post-its. Then he wrote with his perfect writing.

_How long?_

I wrote quickly.

_**2 weeks**_

In my head, I counted to 100 and back in Latin.

_How do you feel?_

_**Weird, threw up yesterday**_

_Jacob knows?_

_**Sort of**_

He looked at me. I looked at him.

_Do you want to make a test?_

I thought about that for a moment, though I didn't stop counting. I wanted to make a test, I really did. But that would be so obvious. Unless…  
I nodded.

_**At the hospital, alone.**_

Just as I finished the last word, nausea was attacking me. I bet Carlisle saw that because suddenly there was a dustbin in my hands.  
Gross.  
Carlisle handed me a box with paper-napkins.  
"Thanks," I managed to say. He started squeezing my stomach. Then he took the pen and wrote.

_No doubt you're pregnant._

I glared at him. Then someone knocked the door. Esme, I thought.  
"Hold on," Carlisle told her.

_Still wanna go to the hospital?_

_**As soon as possible.**_

"Please enter, Esme."  
She stepped inside. "Is everyone all right?" Esme asked, considering as always.  
"Everyone is fine, just fine," Carlisle answered her. "I'm going to the hospital, Dr Tremor Called."  
"Okay." She smiled and turned to leave.  
"Could you get Alice for me?" I asked her.  
"Sure." Esme smiled and left this time. I began writing again.

_**I'll meet you at the hospital.**_

_You sure?_

Of course not, Carlisle. How could you think anything else? I continued writing quickly.

**_Jake._**

Then Alice came inside. She looked a bit suspicious. Carlisle eyed me and left us.  
"Please, sit," I asked Alice. She hesitated for a while, but then she sat down anyway.  
"Did you, like, get any weird visions lately?" I whispered.  
"Nah, just Carlisle doing a pregnancy test at the hospital."  
I put my hand at her cheek._  
This stays with you_, I ordered. She gasped, eyes wide with shock. I glared at her. Her eyes were pointed at me, though she was somewhere else. I saw the clock in the corner of my eye.  
"I have to go. Promise." She nodded, eyes still far away. I wondered what she saw, but I didn't dwell on it. Instead I turned towards the door and started walking.  
"Renesmee, wait!"  
Alice gave me a note with something written on it.

**Where will you be?**

I took the pen out of her hand.

_La Push. Don't call. Thanks._

I tried to smile and left the office.


	5. 4 Options

4. OPTIONS

I drove quickly down to La Push, not really paying any attention to the road. I thought about how I would explain this to Mom. Not to mention Dad...

I could just tell her right away. _I'm pregnant. Don't ask._ And then just leave without meeting her gaze. But I realized I would have to answer her questions and accusations eventually anyway. I was such a coward! Option A was out.

I could lie. Say something like: _We just had a little fight, and Jake overreacted. It's okay, nothing to worry about._

_Why didn't you just tell me?_ She would ask.

_I didn't want any questions..._

That would probably work perfect with any other human being. But I knew Bella Cullen too well to even try to lie. Sooner or later, she would catch me with a big, fat lie. Literally. Option B was out, too.

Witch left me with only one option, C.

Option C was quite embarrassing. It was to ask Jacob what the hell I was going to do. I decided as I stopped the car by our house; I would talk to Jacob on our way to the hospital.

I opened the door. "Jake! Jacob Black?"

"In a minute!" He was in the kitchen. Our house wasn't big at all. Two rooms and a kitchen. And bathroom, thankfully...

The bedroom contained one queen-sized bed, two closets and a mirror. Alice didn't really approve the one-closet-each-thing. But then, it wasn't her business. I had a few clothes back at Mom and Dad's place. Jacob didn't need that many clothes. I smiled at the thought.

I lay down on the couch and picked up my copy of _Wuthering Heights_. Mom had insisted on me reading it. So far I liked it. A little slow, but still my kind of book. Catherine's pathetic with all her crying, but I like Heathcliff. I feel like we have something in common, me and him. We're both a bit different...

I put it back on the table. I knew it wasn't good for me to think about what I was.

I started to look around the room instead. The front door was at the eastern side of the house. It led to the living room, where I was at the moment. When you got in you almost crashed into our little TV, but if you held left you would crash into the fireplace instead.

In front of the TV was the couch, one armchair and a little table. There was a bookshelf, too. Poor thing didn't get that much attention.

The kitchen was nothing special, just a very rectangular room, filled with furniture that would remind you of a...kitchen.

I chuckled at myself. Of course it looked like a kitchen, stupid!

"What?" asked the sweetest voice in the entire universe.

I stood up, taking his hand while I rushed for the door.

"Where's the fire?"

"I'll explain on the way. Just come." We got into the car, and I immediately put the key in the ignition and turned it.

"Hang on," Jacob said. He took my face between his hands. "Where are we going?"

I put my hands around his neck. _To the hospital_, I thought.

He looked confused.

_Carlisle knows. And probably Alice, too._

Jacob sighed and bent in to kiss me. His lips was soft against mine, moving vividly.

I exhaled and shifted the clutch. "Here we go," I said, hoping that I didn't sound as freaked out as I was.


	6. 5 Talk

5.

TALK

"The hospital?" he said, almost accusing.

I glowered at him.

"I thought you didn't want—"

"Yeah, well now I do," I said, a little too much rage in my voice. He looked out the window and I sighed. How would I put this in a good way? "Jake, you have to help me," I whispered as I turned onto the one-oh-one. He took my hand and turned towards me. I felt weird, dizzy. I was looking for something, though I didn't know what.

"What's wrong?"

I wasn't really sure if he was asking about what I said or what I did — but I was focused on something else...

No. This wasn't happening. Not again. I stopped the car and ran outside.

And then I threw up.

"Ew," I heard myself say. _Ew, ew, ew!_ "You got a napkin or something?" I coughed. I heard the dry leaves on the ground rustle as he walked to a tree.

"Er, I hope this is okay..." He handed me a few leaves.

"Thanks," I managed to say, and sat down on the wet road. For once I was glad we lived here. The rain would take away the smell. Not that many people wandered along the one-oh-one.

Jacob sat down beside be and stroke my back. I breathed heavily. I thought this was the time to...negotiate?

"What am I going to say to Mom?"

"Well, I am not an expert on planning difficult conversations—"

"Please, Jacob. _Please_ help me."

"I don't know how!"

"You must have _one_ idea, at least."

"I'm not sure..."

I tried to be sneaky. "Tell me something."

"What?"

"How did Mom tell you about me?" _Mohaha, it worked!_

"That's not my story to tell..."

_Bastard! Are you trying to keep the truth from me?_ "Oh, I believe it is."

"Why don't you just ask Bella?"

_You're not just a liar, you're stupid too._ I glared at him. "I sort of asked her yesterday, but she didn't exactly answer my question."

"What did she tell you?"

"That's not my story to tell," I hissed and repeated Jacob's earlier statement.

"Oh, come _on_!"

"Fine. She told me her 'story'" I could feel him stiffen beside me.

"Okay..."

"But she stopped at the part where she got pregnant."

"Oh..."

I waited for him to say something else. But he didn't.

"So I was kind of thinking that you might tell me more about that."

"I don't know—"

"Or do you think I should ask Rosalie?" I tried to sound really sarcastic, and I succeeded. But, obviously, that didn't help a lot.

"That is a great idea." He rose. "Feeling better?"

"Depends..." I hurried to the driver's seat and started the engine. There was a moment of silence, but then my phone rang. At first I thought I'd just let it ring, I had the feeling it was Dad. But I figured it might have been Carlisle, too.

I picked it up from my pocket. _Carlisle calling_, the screen said.

"Renesmee Cullen," I answered it.

"Hey, it's Carlisle. Where are you?"

"I'm on my way. Had to stop for a moment..." Such a wonderful moment.

"Okay, I see. Just wanted to make sure you were all right."

"I'm fine. Meet you in five."

"Bye."

I hung up. I tried to stop the panic in my stomach, but it wasn't easy.

"She showed me."

_What?_

"What?"

"Bella showed me she was pregnant."

"How?"

"Well, Nessie, you see, when a woman is pregnant, her stomach gets kinda huge."

"Do you think I'm retarded?" I didn't mean to sound so angry, but I couldn't help it.

He chuckled. "Calm down. She showed me her stomach."

I thought about that for a moment. I glanced down at my stomach. _No, it's not big enough_, my inner voice told me. But I had promised Mom to tell her what was wrong.

I didn't have more time to think about that, we were already at the hospital. I opened the door to the car and walked slowly outside, staring at my feet. Suddenly there was another pair of shoes on the ground. I took a deep breath, and looked up to meet his eyes. My Jacob. He looked like he was trying to compose his face, but I knew he must have been more scared than I was. I took his hand in mine and smiled.

_I love you_, I thought as we started walking out of the rain and into the warmth of the hospital, though the temperature didn't really matter.

He gave my hand a gentle squeeze.


	7. 6 Truth

Jacob held my hand during the whole test. He looked a little scared, and sort of happy, when Carlisle said that everything seemed all right. Carlisle also said that we'd probably ought to make a new test every week, since I was half-human-half vampire, and Jacob was a werewolf. He and the pack banned everyone who mentioned shape-shifter, and so I called him werewolf.

What a funny child! Third-human-third-vampire-third-werewolf… I wondered what it must feel like to be your own enemy. Would my child be a Smeagol/Gollum?

No. No, no, no. Schizophrenia and whatever this was could not be the same thing!

It wasn't, I decided.

I asked Jacob to leave for a moment; I wanted to talk with Carlisle. He went out to the car, wary. Carlisle looked at me with concerned eyes.

"Is it really as good as it looks?" I asked when I knew Jacob couldn't hear.

He sighed. "I don't know. But if this would be a human child—which I doubt this is—everything would have looked great. So don't worry."

I didn't really listen to what he said. I just looked right into his golden eyes. He opened his mouth, as if to say something, but I was faster. "What am I going to say to Mom?" I didn't have time to think of another way to put that.

"I think the best way is to just tell her. She'll find out eventually anyway."

"Dad's gonna kill me…" I murmured.

"No, he is not. I can talk to him, if you'd like?"

_No! No way!_ "Um…"

"Or you can do it yourself."

Okay, so I'd rather have Carlisle "telling" Dad than me doing it.

"Fine, but could you at least wait until, like, I don't know, next week?" Dang, my voice broke.

"Tomorrow, or you will do it yourself."

I clenched my teeth. "Fine."

I smashed the door shut and put my hands on the wheel. Then I couldn't hold it in any longer. The tears ran down my cheeks. Jacob took me in his arms. I sat in his lap, crying like I'd never done before in his presence. He didn't say anything, he just comforted me by being there, stroking my back.

I hadn't noticed it was dark until I heard my phone ringing. I tried to ignore it, but Jake took it out of my pocket.

"Hi, Bella, it's Jacob," he answered it and gave me a meaningful eye. I groaned. He listened to what she said. And then he handed me the phone.

"Renesmee Carlie Cullen, where are you?"

I started the engine. "I'm on my way. Where do I meet you?"

"The big house."

I cut her off. I switched on the radio and pressed the accelerator.

"Can you turn up the volume?"

He pushed the button three times.

"Louder…"

"Nessie—"

"Just do it! I don't want to think!" And I didn't. I didn't think. I just sang, or maybe shouted, along with the songs. I didn't want Dad to hear my thoughts.

As soon as we got to the house, I flew inside. "Mom!"

She was there in the third of a second. "Let's go outside." She dragged me with her. I was very thankful to the fact that she understood that I didn't want Dad there.

We hunted in silence. I caught a few foxes, my favorite. But I couldn't keep this inside anymore.

And neither could she.

"Renesmee, what's wrong?"

I took a deep breath. "Mom, please don't kill me…" I whispered.

"Hon', why in the world would I want to kill you?"

"I'm pregnant." There, I said it.

"What? You're pregnant?"

_Oh, no. Oh no, no, no! Don't kill me! Please don't…_

She stared at me for two and a half seconds. It felt like years.

"Come here," she said and embraced me. "Why would I want to kill you?"

I ignored her question. _Mom, I'm scared._

"Yes, I know."

_That's not very comforting. Just so you know._

She chuckled. "Sorry."

We started walking back towards the house. Mom held my hand; she really knew how to comfort me.

We talked about my day. About the test, that everything looked good. We talked about her theories. She had actually thought of pregnancy earlier, but she'd thought it was impossible. Not literally impossible, though, but she just couldn't believe it.

We also talked about her becoming a grandmother at the age of 43. Sort of…

She never mentioned Jake or Dad, and neither did I. I was just beginning to relax a bit when we saw the opening in the forest.


End file.
